In my first draft, it was hard to start the paper and what kind of perspective I want to write on in my paper. I was not too sure on the topic we should write on and so I begin to just use the paragraph I have wrote from the one in eportfolio.

My peer really liked my example of elevator for growth mindset. As Mia said “I liked how you used the strong example of helping a person recover from their elevator trauma. You also discussed cognitive behavioral therapy as a solution to fixed mindedness. This helped further your argument because you were able to talk about a solution to your thesis.”

I think for Dweck’s section I associated with fixed mindset and growth mindset with behavior and giving example of them. My peer think that I should explain the consequences of having a fixed mindset than just saying it is bad. As Mia said “This is a good claim because you talk about the consequences of having a fixed mindset.”

I think for Lukianoff/Haidt I explained more on the trigger warnings and how the cognitive therapy can help with felling offended/ cause past trauma. My peer think that I should use a strong transition such as in contrast. As Mia said “Use a  strong transition like “in contrast” or “alternatively” something along those lines.”

My peer said “Something I would focus on would be introducing your quotes and adding more analysis. You tend to rush into the evidence and next claim without fully explaining it. By doing this, your argument will become stronger and more coherent. There are a couple of run on sentences and just a few minor grammatical errors.” I think I should work on how to introduce my quote than just putting my evidence out there. So I should explain what the quote is trying to say first and then put my quote. I also should fix my grammar and run on sentence to make the sentence more complete.

In Dweck’s TED talk and in Lukianoff and Haidt’s “The Coddling” article, they talk about the issues of having a fixed mindset and how it influences people to have hard time handling offensive conversations or past trauma. We should start having more understanding and be able to have a growth mindset.